Summer Television

It's definitely summer. Summer television options are usually pretty bleak, and this year is no exception. Nonetheless, I almost always find something that I can watch, especially when the heat index is 110+ outside.

My favorite among the returning summer shows is So You Think You Can Dance. Unlike in previous years, I don't (yet) have a major crush on any of the dancers. Kameron Bink from season three remains one of my biggest crushes of all time, and Twitch from last season was absolutely adorable. The judges are somewhat of an acquired taste, and in some cases, it hasn't happened for me yet. It's still worth tuning in every week to see the incredible dancing. And what's not to like about Cat Deeley?

America's Got Talent would be a great show if they changed everything about it. Hate the judges and the producers. OK. I like Sharon Osborne. She can stay. But everything else has got to go. It's way too much fluff and not nearly enough performances. Jerry Springer does much better with his own show, so I'm glad to see that he's been replaced. Haven't checked out the new guy and probably won't.

Don't count me among the fans of the Top Chef Masters, either. Love Top Chef and expected that would be the case with Masters. Nope. Getting to know the contestants over time makes it work. The masters come and go so fast it's hard to keep up with them. And where is Padma? I haven't seen her since her super-hot soft-porn commercial for Hardee's. Her replacement is cute, but not in the same ballpark as Padma.

Real Housewives of New Jersey is definitely the best of the Housewives shows. I love (or love to hate) the Atlanta babes, but these NJ ladies take it all to another level. Danielle is absolutely the biggest slut on any of the Housewives shows. But what sets this show apart from the other Housewives shows is the connection between the rest of the cast. Reminds me of Momma's family where all the sisters and sisters-in-law were best friends and did everything together. I've seen what they do to the likes of Danielle. These ladies are tight.

Last year I caught Paris's BFF in reruns. This year I turned it off during the first episode. Yawn. Instead, I've been following Daisy of Love. If you haven't yet met Daisy, you need to check her out. She's unreal, literally and figuratively. That 20 guys with names like 12-Pack, Big Rig, and Sinister would compete to be her love interest, especially when you get the impression they're all boinking her along the way...well...it's really a testament to where we are as a society today.

I've also been watching Charm School--Rikki Lake's reality show to transform women who appear to have worked most recently as strippers and/or prostitutes. I'm not sure how Daisy got her own show instead of being a contestant on this one. She'd fit right in with the rest of the cast. A house full of sluts is guaranteed drama. But the big reason to tune into Charm School: see the apparently infinite variety of ways to make a modest, school-girl uniform look slutty.

I'm looking forward to the second season of Ruby. Her journey to lose weight is interesting. And you couldn't ask for a better backdrop than beautiful Savannah. She reminds me at different times of various members of my extended family network that struggled with weight issues for most of their lives. Ruby has a rather unique, sing-song way of talking. I'm going to pay close attention so I can start talking like her. That should keep me from being...

The Crotchety Old Man